Gul Dukat @dukat@tenforward.social

Dear Deadjournal,

sorry I haven't logged on in a while. damar installed a great new winamp visualizer so I've been a little distracted

Very excited to be the new dictator of the cardassian empire. my first law: Benjamin Sisko is now my best friend and is required to invite me to play the human game of "basing ball"

I fell on my back while wearing my armor and lay there waving my arms and legs in the air for several hours

how to meet girls
how to meet girls in space
how to make girls like me
mirror universe sexy
how to be friends

yummy mummy goes for a very high premium on cardassia prime and no one knows why

I can recognize a VERY good deal when I see one

Refused to buy that fixer-upper klingon warship until I noticed the previous owner had left behind two open boxes of novelty cereal from five years ago

taking a spa day on a horrifying god-forsaken desert planet 🐍🌞

Bajoran girls are really into contact juggling, right?

i wear this armor all the time because im afraid to get too close to anyone. also because if i take it off while on duty i will be killed

which JOKER on this ship hid my contact lenses forcing me to wear an enormous pair of coke bottle glasses for the twenty five video transmissions i sent major kira last night

Weyoun keeps trying to get me to play crazy eights with him but I just want to practice smiling in peace

I don't know what an "awoo" is and I completely refuse to learn

I am GREAT at my job thank you, my boss had literally NO reason to leave 500 automated video messages about how much he hates me embedded in the systems of Terok Nor

look, despite what the trolls are saying, the only reason i called benjamin sisko last night was to make sure he knows i've been lifting weights and looking very cool while doing it

}:->

another day working in the capitol on cardassia prime. everyone keeps asking if they can rub their cloaca on the imperial symbol. buddy,

Now entering Federation space...