To those who voted for me: thank you. It's through your support that I have come to realize just how pathetic and disgusting the human species really is.

To those who didn't vote for me: what's wrong with you?! Did you even SEE the other two options? Deplorable.

To those who didn't vote: you'd make great Cardassians!

Humans think they've found evidence of life on Venus ... and here I thought the only life of note in the Sol system was me. When I visit.

Q boosted

I'd be far less concerned with whether or not I'm right, and focus on whether or not you're wrong. So very... very wrong.

Good luck, bipedal primate!

So many intelligent races consume potions & poisons for amusement. It's a wonder any of you learned to control fire.

Don't you ever find it boring, dying after barely existing? It must be dreadfully dull.

❌ is there any way to mass-mute bots, or to otherwise hide them in the Federated timeline?

Using Emoji to Flavor your Role Playing Toots! 

❌ Reposting for good measure

❌ While neither enforced nor universally adopted, several members of this instance use some or all of the following symbols to flesh out their toots:

πŸ’­ thoughts (note: able to be heard by psychics)

πŸ—― yelling

πŸ’¬ incoming comms

[actions or scene description]

❌ out of character (like this toot!)

You know who's part of the 1%?


All of the rest of you are little-more than noisy clusters of atoms grasping at the stars, wishing they could do something - anything - worth a damn before disappearing into the dust like all your ancestors before you.

Do you want to know what an evolved Klingon looks like?

Me too. Let me know if you ever find one.

The more I watch humans eat, the more revolted I become. How primitive.

I once thought that the universe was devoid of intelligent life. Just little blobs of matter floating in the void, entirely lacking meaning.

Then I found humans, on their wet little world orbiting an utterly ordinary star. Bipedal beings, once called, "ugly bags of mostly water" by a far superior entity, wandering aimlessly on their dull planet.

Turns out, I was right: there really is no intelligent life in the universe... except me, of course.

It feels intentional that the orange skinned human is stealing all of my attention. It's like he wants to hurt me! How rude.

Sometimes you just need to disappear to an alternate reality where there is no matter, and time moves at a crawl compared to this one, just to get a few millennia of peace and quiet away from you ingrates.

Some members of the Federation like to say that I'm cruel, deceptive, or outright evil. To them I say... thank you.

Oh my, well hello @Worf old buddy! How goes all the brutal infighting and unnecessary bloodshed?

Ugh, why is it that no matter how long I leave... whenever I return there appear to be MORE of you carbon based lifeforms than before. Ooh how I long for some quiet, lifeless voids. Tracts of space with nary an "intelligent" being in sight.

Q boosted

Temba, his arms wide: The newspaper, the zebra in the sun.

*knock knock*
"Jalad. Darmok?
"Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra!"

Q boosted

I don't mean to brag, but I'm clearly the most popular space station on Mastodon.

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